Abstinence Or Moderation??

I have been thinking about the human need to reproduce. I will refrain from being more explicit than that. My Mother asked her Grandmother what they used to do for birth control when she was a young woman. She told Mom that they just abstained, yes that is the word the old woman used.

The amusing thing about it was she had 12 kids. My Mom said she remembered thinking that her grandparents must not have abstained very often.

My Mom had the Rh- and RH+ problem when I was born and when my brother was born he was so jaundiced that they had preped him for a blood transfusion. The doctors told her that if she had any more babies they would probably be brain damaged. So she opted to have her tubes tied. She didn’t have to worry about birth control any more.

When I was first married, I took birth control pills and then a few of the other options. They all made me sick in one way or another.  But I still managed to have both of my kids on purpose, as opposed to accidental, unplanned or whatever you prefer to call it.

I had a very hard time with my son’s birth. I was in the hospital for 10 days. I was told that the next time would likely be worse. So, it was very important for me not to get pregnant again, because if I had a stroke or died, my children would be orphaned.  I did have a few scares and a few miscarriages, so I can relate to that happening, but I had insurance and enough money to feed and care for children.

I just have a hard time understanding people not being responsible for their reproduction.  I understand physical needs, but I don’t think you should have sex unless you are prepared to take the risk of disease or pregnancy.  So, I guess I believe in responsibility , because abstinence didn’t work for my great grandma then and it is not likely to work now.

With that in mind, here are a few quotes on abstinence, which agree with moderation.

“Use, do not abuse; neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy.             Voltaire quotes (French Philosopher and Writer. One of the greatest of all French authors, 1694-1778)

Half the vices, which the world condemns most loudly, have seeds of good in them and require moderate use rather than total abstinence.

Samuel Butler

English As A Second Language

When I got married, I moved to a rural area of Ohio, with my husband and close to his family. I took me a while to learn what some of the things they said meant. A couple of good examples are these: My husband worked for a demolition company and he and his friends kept talking about something called a “Bacco”. I thought they were using some slang for Tobacco. I couldn’t figure out what tobacco had to do with construction and demolition. I finally figured out they were talking about a type of heavy equipment called a Back Hoe. I could have asked, but I frequently make use of the adage. “Keep your mouth shut and look dumb, or open your mouth and remove all doubt..”


Then when someone was sick, my mother-in-law and father-in-law would say they were “hippoed”. I eventually learned they were using slang to say people were hypochondriacs. They were just pronouncing hypo as hippo. There were many other things that either I didn’t understand or they didn’t.

Communication was frequently difficult for me. I would say things in proper English grammar and they would say, “What?’  I would have to think of a way to say things that they could understand.  Eventually, my speech became increasingly slang prone. 

When I think or write, I do it in the proper grammar. It is like thinking in English and then having to translate it into Spanish, or thinking in Spanish and trying to translate it into English. I am not being arrogant. It is just that I was taught grammar by very good teachers and it stuck. I wonder just how many other areas in the U.S. who are being hindered by English teachers who don’t do their jobs? I also wonder if people who know me personally and hear my day to day speech will read my journals and think it doesn’t sound like me? Maybe I should make an entry in my journals to explain the difference in “voice”. 

Genealogy Site I Found

I found an interesting genealogy site. There are some entries about journaling and how to find old books online. I love to read, so that was an added bonus. Because it is a genealogy blog, the journaling parts urge you to journal because it will become a treasure to your family and others when you die. I don’t know if my family likes what I say in the here and now, so, I’m counting on my grandchildren or great grandchildren. LOL

In addition to genealogy, journaling and reading being some of my favorite words, free ranks right up there. The blog shows how to get the most out of project Gutenberg. I knew they had free books, but I didn’t know they had so many different ways to utilize them. I expect to use the downloadable stuff on my Ipod, soon. Here is the link